Lesson #2: Laughter is Good Medicine

If you had asked me before I married what I wanted in a husband, “a good sense of humor” would not have been the first thing that sprang to mind. No, I was looking for a smart, solid Christian who loved kids, wanted a bunch of them, and was open to homeschooling. Being “tall, dark, and handsome” was not essential, but would be a much-appreciated bonus (especially the “tall” part, as I’m 5’11″ myself). That I should try to find “an animated storyteller with an infectious laugh” never even occurred to me.

Fortunately, God ignored that oversight and gave me a man who was not only everything I dreamed of, but was witty, playful, and spontaneous, too. My husband knows how to make me laugh! A slight tilt of his head or a knowing wink can instantly bring an amused smile to my face. A cleverly turned phrase or droll observation will get me to giggling. But when Doug tells a story, he uses his whole body to act it out, sending our entire family into hysterics with deep, uproarious laughter that leaves our sides aching afterwards. How dull and dreary my life might have been without all that!

It is with good reason the Bible tells us to “rejoice always.” (1 Thess. 5:16, Phil. 4:4). Science has demonstrated time and again that our attitudes and dispositions have a profound effect upon our immune function. Joyous, mirthful laughter really is good medicine. (see Prov. 17:22) Here are just a few of the many great things a good belly-laugh does for you:

• Improves Health – laughter boosts your immunity and wards off disease by increasing killer cell activity
• Brightens Mood – laughter triggers the release of endorphins, the “feel good” chemicals in our brains
• Relieves Tension – laughter reduces stress, fear, and anxiety while relaxing muscles throughout the body
• Increases Energy – laughter helps us to recharge and refocus, to work harder and accomplish more
• Defuses Conflict – laughter keeps disagreements and disputes from becoming dirty or divisive
• Provides Perspective – laughter makes both minor inconveniences and major adversities more bearable
• Promotes Humility – the ability and willingness to laugh at oneself is an invaluable character trait

I’m convinced that all the laughing my husband and I have done over the past 25 years has not only helped our bodies stay healthy, but has kept our marriage healthy, as well. We laugh at silly songs and corny poems we’ve been making up since we first met. We laugh at funny movies, like Princess Bride and Dan in Real Life. We laugh about our children’s antics, like the toddler who decided just before party guests arrived to completely re-paper our bathroom in maxi-pads. We laugh over embarrassing mistakes, like the time my husband used his cell phone to video our baby toddling around the bathroom, then showed it to a couple dozen coworkers before realizing he’d inadvertently captured me in the background, sitting on the toilet with my pants around my knees. (At least he hadn’t posted it on YouTube!)

What has gotten the biggest laugh out of you recently? We’d love for you to share it, so the rest of us can laugh along

Go to LIFE LESSON #3 >>

If you’d like to read further on this fascinating topic, check out the following articles and resources:

Health Benefits of
Humor and Laughter

The Healing Power
of Laughter

Feeling Good
is Good for You

How Laughter
Works

My Preschooler Put Me in a Padded Cell

Have you ever noticed what a great sense of humor God has? Back in the days when I thought that my home had to look picture perfect for me to entertain guests, my children did their best to make sure it didn’t, and I sometimes wonder whether God didn’t put them up to their antics, just to keep their mama humble.

One such occasion stands out vividly in my memory. My husband and I had both worked overtime cleaning, cooking, and decorating for a Christmas party we were hosting. We finished our preparations with just half an hour to spare and dashed back to our bedroom to get showered and changed before our company arrived.

Meanwhile, our two-year-old sequestered himself in the hall bathroom, whereupon he discovered a stash of maxi-pads stored under the sink. Working quickly but quietly, he unwrapped every last one — no easy task, since I buy in bulk — peeled the adhesive strips off the backs, and stuck them to the cabinet, the floor, the toilet, the tub, and as far up the walls as his little hands could reach.

By the time the doorbell rang about fifteen minutes later, every square inch of the room (from about four feet down) had been padded with super-absorbant softness.

Mercifully, I happened upon the crime scene on my way to answer the front door and was tipped off to the surprise awaiting the first hapless person who wandered in. Sending my husband to greet our guests, I ducked inside and deftly undid the damage. But my toddler was happy to lend a helping hand, and I was smiling as I worked.

What have your little ones done that embarrassed you? How did you react? If you maintain a good sense of humor, you’ll often find that those are the memories that make you laugh hardest in the end.

A Sure-Fire Way to Wipe Out Whining

If you’ve ever had a child who is given to whining, you know how grating it can get on the nerves of every member of the household.

We do our children no favors by letting them get away with such behavior; nevertheless, I think mothers, especially, are prone to make excuses for this bad habit. “He missed his nap. He’s feeling sick. He’s hungry.”

It’s time we crack down on all the constant complaining. Are you with me? Then join my campaign to wipe out whining. The task will take heaping helpings of the following ingredients:

* Commitment – Explain to your little one that his behavior is making it hard for anyone to enjoy his company. Assure him that you love him regardless how he acts, but that you want other people to love him, too, so you’re going to do whatever it takes to help him break his bad habit of whining.

* Consequences – When parents give in to whining, they reward and reinforce such behavior. This must stop immediately. If you hope to help your child overcome this habit, you must make certain his whining never pays off. If he is begging for something he doesn’t really need, like candy at the checkout counter, then deprive him of it completely. If he is whining for something he genuinely does need, like a drink of water when he’s thirsty, then insist that he ask nicely before you give it.

* Cheerfulness – Be careful to model a cheerful, happy disposition yourself. If you are angry and impatient in your responses to your child, your efforts to modulate his behavior will fall flat. In the above example, when your little boy whines for water, fill the cup, get down on his level, smile broadly, and prompt him, “Do you remember the nice way to ask?” Or simply say the words you want and let him parrot them back: “Water, please?” If you’ll teach your child how to say please in sign language (by rubbing his open hand on his chest in a circular motion), then you can even help him “say please” when he is too upset to utter the words. Gently guide his hand through the motion, then respond enthusiastically, “See? Isn’t that a much nicer way to ask?” as you give him his water.

* Compassion – Keep in mind that language skills vary greatly from child to child. One two-year old may be able to say, “Mommy, I feel thirsty. May I have a small glass of water, please?” while the next can barely string two words together, especially when he’s upset. A child’s mind develops much faster than his ability to communicate, and the results can be frustrating for everybody involved. Ensure that older siblings are sensitive to this fact, as well. They must be made to realize that sometimes little brother whines because he doesn’t yet have the words to express, “I don’t like it when you tease me, so stop doing that!”

* Consistency – You cannot crack down on whining one day, ignore it the next, reward it the following, and expect that approach to work. Consistency is of vital importance in conquering the bad habit of whining. But consistency is also important in children’s schedules, especially at this age. Young children are prone to be cranky whenever they are tired and/or hungry, so keeping to a predictable schedule for meals and naptimes will go a long way in helping your child maintain a more pleasant disposition throughout this “stage” of life.

* Contentment - And last, but not least, remember that we teach best by example. If you find yourself murmuring more than you care to admit or even throwing an occasional tantrum, it could mean that your child has come by his whining honestly. By focusing on the positive, we can replace inner grumbling and complaints with gratitude and contentment. And joy begets joy just as surely as discontent breeds discontent. Keep it up, and your children will eventually catch your enthusiasm for living.

Note: This post was adapted from the April issue of “Family Times,” which is a monthly column I write for THE NORTHEAST TEXAN.